Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
