these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
