I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize