so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
