actually, I'm a sock model
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
