What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
