Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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