Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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