i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Randomize
