i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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