honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
