Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
