i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
