Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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