Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
