Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
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