Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
