dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
You are the jesus of drinking
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
