I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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