I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
