Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize