My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
