is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
