He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Randomize
