I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
