i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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