i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I will be naked everywhere
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize