so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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