I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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