In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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