Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
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