There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
