nut hugger
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
