He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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