We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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