I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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