so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
