omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
