i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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