I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
