oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
