I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
