Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
