my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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