Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize