Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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