No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
