i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
thus making me awesome and them whores
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
