she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
