wakey wakey hands off snakey
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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